Monday, December 8, 2008

can we really do anything we want?

i am constantly contemplating my future, i mean who isn't, right? even with a job i'm at such a crossroad in my life. there are so many ideas i have for what i'd like to do with my life, all involving many decisions, of course:

of course, there's grad school... my first choice was nyu but then i started contemplating the need to be in DC if i'm serious about getting involved with education policy. the thing about grad school is that it would be best for me to wait until i can hold a real schedule with continental and work weekends/attend class during the week.

i've always wanted to live in new york city, so when nyu started the program about education policy and advocacy i decided it was the perfect opportunity to further my education and fulfill a lifelong dream. i used to even say that i would sell hot dogs on the street for money if necessary. well, especially since high school, my love of france has grown to be probably even greater than my love for new york. a college friend of mine just told me she's moving to france for a year in february and for a split second i very seriously considered joining her, only now the hot dogs have become crepes. when i had that thought i realized that i would have no way of earning money.

money. it's the reason i have to stay with my job and can't just move to france on a whim. money and i have a love/hate relationship. as we are in this recession, i have to be thankful that i have a job, even if it means that i share a one bedroom apartment with three other people and serve drinks and ham or turkey sandwiches on planes for a living.

then of course there's the other idea of returning to texas. of course i miss my family, but even more than that i hate that i'm missing out on my best friends' kids growing up. even just a few weeks make such an incredible difference!

my mommy and daddy always told me i can do anything i want... but being an adult it's just not practical to pick up and move to paris, even if that's what i want to do.

3 comments:

  1. Harry (my crepe guy) gives me life advice... he told me that I need to get a real job and come to Paris on vacation. I'm not sure how solid his advice is... he has no teeth... but he speaks like 12 languages. So selling crepes must not be too bad!

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  2. after reading this blog i was wondering.....do we read too much? is that even possible? nah....we're good right? as long as we come up for fresh air and speak to other people occasionally i suppose. oh the brilliance and comfort of a good fiction read....sigh.

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